Tag Archives: happiness

Why Your Enthusiasm Makes All the Difference

Book Cover "Enthusiasm Makes The Difference" and sun shining behind clouds, hot air balloon, yellow tulips

Your enthusiasm makes all the difference in life. It makes the difference between success and failure, according to Dr. Norman Vincent Peale’s classic book Enthusiasm Makes The Difference. Enthusiasm is the priceless ingredient of personality that helps to achieve happiness and self-fulfillment. Enthusiasm is the dynamic motivator that keeps us persistently working toward our goals. Most outstanding achievements are accomplished over great odds.

The committed person is the one who finds real excitement in living. You can make yourself an optimist. You can develop your level of enthusiasm.

One method Dr. Peale advises is to determine which characteristic you desire to possess, hold that image firmly in your consciousness and develop it by acting as if you actually possessed that characteristic. Then believe and repeatedly affirm you are in the process of creating the quality you seek to develop.

Noted psychologist Williams James called it the “As If” Principle: “if you want a quality, act as if you already have it.” In other words, act on the assumption that you are what you see yourself as being, and you will in time strongly become that as long as you persevere in the process.

A vital element in developing enthusiasm is the way in which you start your day. The more good news you tell yourself, the more such is likely to be. That which the mind receives upon waking tends to influence (and to a considerable degree determine) what your day will be. Choose enthusiasm daily and you are likely to have it permanently. Have the kind of enthusiasm that believes there is always something new and better ahead.

Find a need and fill it. When you have something you really believe in, then you can put the amazing power of conviction behind your efforts. When you communicate and develop rapport with people, they will like you and buy what you have to offer.

When it comes to being an innkeeper, find a way to fill a need that is not currently being met. What can you do that is better or different than what other accommodations provide? Determine how you can stand out from the crowd.

Focus on what is right about life. Life is too short not to do that. To be a success requires that you give of your whole self, your whole mind. Peale stated the greatest selling job you will ever have to do is selling yourself on yourself. Believing in your own abilities requires the most enthusiastic persuasion. Make yourself believe that you can be better than you think you are.

Enthusiasm can cancel out fear, worry, doubt, depression, and anger. When you keep enthusiastic, the negative emotions do not have a chance. Worry and enthusiasm cannot occupy the same mind at the same time.

According to Dr. Peale, deeply built into human beings is the desire to excel. Competing with oneself (to be the best you can be) is the highest form of competition. Enthusiasm changes the quality of a job because it changes people. Enthusiasm is the powerful drive that makes things happen.

The author tells about his experience interacting with a hotel dishwasher. Being at the bottom of the totem pole at the hotel did not matter to this man because he dreamed of one day becoming the director or manager of this European hotel. By giving the best possible service in his current role, this man continued to assume new responsibilities.

Several years later, when Dr. Peale returned, this man was the Head Waiter, even closer to achieving his dreams. When a person applies enthusiasm to their job, the job becomes alive with exciting possibilities. Peale points out that there is always something new and imaginative you can bring to a familiar job.

Any person who develops enthusiasm for something (and the fortitude to carry it out) can make the most amazing things occur. No one has to be a victim of their circumstances. Enthusiasm builds power under all circumstances (no matter how difficult). Difficulties are part of the maturing process. You are being shaped for the real purpose of your life.

The attitude of a person toward their own self is very important in determining how well they perform and the outcome of their whole life. According to Dr. Peale, often our low status in life is not because our abilities are inferior, it is because our opinions of ourselves are inferior.

Let enthusiasm grip your mind and it will make all the difference. You can have what you want from life provided your enthusiasm is strong enough to push barriers aside.

 

Proven Activities For Health, Wealth, Happiness, and Success

Book Cover Napoleon Hill's Action Activities
Who does not want health, wealth, happiness, and success in life? The book Napoleon Hill’s Action Activities: for Health, Wealth, and Happiness is an official publication of the Napoleon Hill Foundation to continue his legacy of leadership. It includes excerpts from his books as well as ideas for ways to apply his teachings in today’s world.

Attributes of Personal Initiative include:

  • Adoption of a definite major purpose
  • Motivation to inspire continuous action toward that purpose
  • Self-discipline and persistence to keep moving forward
  • Habit of going the extra mile
  • Capacity to concentrate your full attention on one task at a time
  • A positive mental attitude at all times
  • Habit of following through with any task once begun

Anything worth having is worth pursuing. According to Hill, the desires would not be placed in us unless we had the potential to achieve them.

Have a world vision that is larger than yourself. Give yourself away for a cause that is greater than you. This must be something you willingly give to others because you find it rewarding.

Many innkeepers decide to become B&B owners and hosts because of their desire to help their guests feel welcome. Proprietors also have the opportunity to promote their local area.

Magnificent Outcome (M.O.):

  • What you desire: Who am I? What is my special calling? Innkeepers may ask, “How can my inn reflect the talents and gifts that are uniquely my own?”
  • How you will achieve it: What positive dream engages my mind, monopolizes my thoughts, and pushes me forward? What is it I would do for the sole enjoyment of doing?
  • The positive outcome you can expect to achieve for staying the course: How, when, and where do I envision my magnificent outcome?

There is a sense of satisfaction that comes from using your unique talents and gifts. Your gifts could include teaching a cooking class, guiding guests on local trails, giving yoga instruction, hosting private parties, demonstrating art techniques in your retreat, coordinating weddings, leading conferences, and so much more. The key is to choose the things that you love doing and that will help your inn to stand out from your competition.

Habits Are the Stairway to a Richer Life

You can see many outcomes in your life (and the lives of others) based upon examining personal habits. When habits are entrenched, people operate on autopilot. Little brain power is involved in recalling these habits once learned.

Little actions taken over time create profound lifetime habits that determine our destiny. Through our simple daily actions we create the patterns that become automatic through repetition in our lives. Habits of action will create the life you choose to live one step at a time.

“A man cannot directly choose his circumstances, but he can choose his thoughts, and so indirectly, yet surely, shape his circumstances.” (Napoleon Hill)

Habits begin with thought. Look for the positive (rather than the negative). Look for something to praise (rather than something to complain about). Our thoughts shape our world and, in turn, shape our earthly destiny.

The 12 Riches of Life:

  • A positive mental attitude
  • Sound physical health
  • Harmony in human relationships
  • Freedom from fear
  • The capacity for faith
  • Willingness to share one’s blessings
  • A labor of love
  • An open mind on all subjects
  • Self-discipline
  • The capacity to understand people
  • Financial security

When we discipline ourselves, our life goes better. Our lives are the results of the choices we make. When we delay gratification, we can reach higher, more ideal levels of performance. Self-discipline begins with the mastery of our thoughts. Self-discipline enables you to think first and act afterward.

Develop the Habit of Going the Extra Mile:

  • Do more than you are paid for
  • When you sow the seeds of excellent service, you reap the harvest
  • Listen to those around you to see if you can uplift them in some way
  • Do something special for someone else

Going the extra mile is related to the hospitality that innkeepers extend to their guests. Innkeepers seem to be blessed with the seemingly effortless ability to anticipate the needs of their guests. I admire their dedication to go above and beyond guest expectations.

Live Life to the Fullest:

  • Celebrate the beauty of life and cherish the time given to you
  • Choose life each moment and live it to your fullest potential
  • Think good thoughts and keep focused on advancing your life
  • Memorize and recite positive affirmations and quotes
  • Express heartfelt gratitude for what you already have
  • Make time for relaxation and fun
  • Read biographies of successful people
  • Identify positive attributes that you want to develop
  • Move beyond your comfort zone to expand your horizons
  • Share your blessings and be a giver
  • Be true to your calling by defining your purpose and acting upon it
  • Focus on completion and not perfection
  • Bloom when you are ready
“Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, the mind can achieve.” (Napoleon Hill)

I believe it is important to continue to read and learn throughout your life. I read more books now than I did in college and graduate school! I love that this book encourages readers to continue to develop your mind and your habits because that influences your destiny. Napoleon Hill lived an inspirational life and his legacy continues through his foundation.

 

What Mentally Strong People Do

Book Cover: 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do by Amy MorinThis post will highlight the book, 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do: Take Back Your Power, Embrace Change,  Face Your Fears, and Train Your Brain for Happiness and Success by Amy Morin.

The author defines mental strength as being able to regulate your emotions, manage your thoughts, and behave in a positive manner.  Anyone has the power to improve their mental strength.  The benefits of mental strength include:

  • Increased resilience to stress: better equipped to handle problems more efficiently and effectively
  • Improved life satisfaction: behaving according to your values = peace of mind, recognizing what’s really important in life
  • Enhanced performance: helps you reach your full potential

So what are the 13 things mentally strong people don’t do? Then we look at what they do instead.

1) Mentally strong people don’t waste time feeling sorry for themselves:

  • Focus on what they can still accomplish with their life
  • Choose to take control and change their attitude
  • Make a conscious decision to celebrate life’s gifts
  • Feel grateful for what they have
  • Volunteer, stay active, and continue to learn new things
  • Look for the silver lining in circumstances
  • Actively problem solve to improve situations
  • Participate in experiences/activities that help them feel better
  • Stay focused on what they do have rather than what they don’t have

2) Mentally strong people don’t give away their power:

  • Set limits to create healthy boundaries
  • Don’t depend on others to regulate their feelings
  • Don’t let others define their self worth
  • Don’t avoid addressing the real problem
  • Don’t become a victim of their circumstances
  • Don’t give other people’s words more power than they deserve
  • Don’t lose sight of their goals
  • Speak up when people hurt their feelings so they don’t grow resentful
  • Forgive those who attack them so they don’t have any more power over them
  • Forgiveness reduces stress, increases tolerance to pain, and can lengthen life
  • Let go of their anger to focus their energy on a worthwhile cause
  • Don’t allow any one person’s opinion to define them
  • Evaluate feedback to determine if it has any validity
  • Remind themselves they have a choice in everything they do, think, and feel
  • Choose to define who they are going to be in life
  • Realize no one else has the power to control how you feel
  • Set healthy emotional and physical boundaries with people
  • Behave proactively by making conscious choices about their responses
  • Take full responsibility for how they choose to spend their time and energy
  • Are willing to examine feedback and criticism without jumping to conclusions
  • Don’t blame others for their own behavior
  • Don’t allow criticism to control how they feel about themselves

3) Mentally strong people don’t shy away from change:

  • Know that staying the same often means getting stuck in a rut
  • Open to learning new things, improving their life, developing healthier habits
  • Focus on what they can do to make a positive difference
  • Make changes based on what is best
  • Don’t allow emotions to make the final decision
  • Create a successful plan for change
  • Create goals they would like to accomplish in the next 30 days
  • Establish accountability and monitor their progress
  • Behave like the person the want to become
  • Set realistic time frames and reach their goals

4) Mentally strong people don’t focus on things they can’t control:

  • Focus on what they can control
  • Don’t waste energy worrying about what they can’t control
  • Point out the positives in others making a genuine effort to create change
  • Stop trying to force people to be different
  • Ask for help when they need it
  • Keep the emphasis on influencing others rather than controlling them

5) Mentally strong people don’t worry about pleasing everyone:

  • Don’t base their self-worth on the way other people seem to perceive them
  • Don’t make decisions based on trying to please everyone
  • They are authentic to who they really are
  • Recognize that worrying about trying to please everyone is a waste of time
  • Know exactly what their core values are so they make the best choices
  • Have more time and energy to devote to their own goals
  • Say no when they don’t want to do something
  • Behave assertively even when speaking up may not be well received
  • Don’t lose sight of who they are and what their values are
  • Don’t automatically say yes to an invitation, they consider if it’s a good choice
  • Don’t agree with people and comply with their requests to avoid confrontation
  • Know that they do not have to go along with the crowd
  • Can express their own opinion even if it goes against what the majority of people think

6) Mentally strong people don’t fear taking calculated risks:

  • Make decisions based on logic
  • Know that emotion interferes with making logical choices
  • Weigh the potential costs against the potential benefits
  • Decide if it will help them achieve their goals
  • Consider the alternatives
  • Ask, “How good would it be if the best scenario came true?”
  • Ask, “What is the worst thing that could happen and how could I reduce the risk that it will occur?
  • Willing to do more research in order to calculate the risk better
  • Resolve to make the best decision possible with all the information that is available
  • Monitor the outcomes of the risks they take
  • Make strategic judgments not blind gambles
  • Are willing to take risks that cause them discomfort
  • Don’t allow irrational thoughts to influence their willingness to try something new

7) Mentally strong people don’t dwell on the past:

  • Shift their thinking to move forward
  • Give themselves something else to think about
  • Establish goals for the future
  • Focus on the lessons they’ve learned
  • Think about the facts, not the emotion
  • Look at the situation differently
  • Make peace with the past
  • Practice forgiveness
  • Accept experiences so they can live in the present

8) Mentally strong people don’t make the same mistakes over and over:

  • Learn from their past mistakes and don’t repeat them
  • Find out what went wrong and what they could have done better
  • Know what they will do differently next time
  • Create a written plan to prevent repeating the same mistakes
  • Establish behavior that will replace the previous behavior
  • Hold themselves accountable and think about alternatives
  • Use positive self-talk and keep their goals in mind
  • Create a list of reasons why they don’t want to repeat your mistake
  • View mistakes as an opportunity to improve themselves for the future
  • Acknowledge personal responsibility for each mistake
  • Don’t make excuses or refuse to examine their role in the outcome
  • Don’t put themselves in situations where they are likely to fail

9) Mentally strong people don’t resent other people’s success:

  • Secure enough not to be threatened by the success of others
  • Avoid comparing themselves to others
  • Focus on their strengths, not their weaknesses
  • Don’t insult other people’s accomplishments
  • Stop trying to determine what is fair
  • Focus on cooperation not competition
  • Happy about others’ accomplishments
  • Create their own definition of success
  • Replace negative thoughts with more rational thoughts

10) Mentally strong people don’t give up after the first failure:

  • Don’t allow failure to define who they are
  • Know that deliberate practice is more important than natural talent
  • Accept that failure is part of the process that helps you learn and grow
  • Realize failure is often part of the journey to success
  • Learn from their failures
  • Understand they will be okay even if they fail repeatedly
  • Rest assured that they are becoming better with each failure
  • Resolve to try again even if previous attempts were not successful
  • Develop a new plan to increase their chance of success

11) Mentally strong people don’t fear alone time:

  • Use alone time to reflect on their goals and set future goals
  • Write in a journal
  • Learn meditation which can improve health, emotions, memory, etc.
  • Take a few minutes every day to be alone with their thoughts
  • Reflect on their goals and progress every day

12) Mentally strong people don’t feel the world owes them anything:

  • Know that life isn’t meant to be fair–that some people have more positive experiences than others
  • Realize they have choices in how they respond to disappointments
  • Spend more time helping others
  • Behave like a team player
  • Focus on their efforts, not their importance
  • Acknowledge their flaws and weaknesses
  • Stop and think about how others feel
  • Don’t keep score
  • Practice humility which makes them stronger
  • Have a healthy amount of self-esteem
  • Focus on what they have to give, not what they want to take
  • Give back to other people in need

13) Mentally strong people don’t expect immediate results:

  • Don’t underestimate how difficult change is
  • Recognize that progress isn’t always obvious
  • Know what kind of results to expect to see in a specific time frame
  • Practice delayed gratification
  • Keep their eyes on the prize
  • Remind themselves of their goals in creative ways
  • Celebrate the milestones along their journey
  • Deal with the feelings of frustration and impatience in a healthy way
  • Pace themselves for the long haul
  • Establish realistic expectations and don’t expect results tomorrow
  • Look for areas in their life where they can improve
  • Focus on finding strategies to help them develop the skills to make progress
  • Develop a plan to help themselves resist temptation
  • Find accurate ways to measure their progress

Maintaining mental strength means…

  • Incorporating mental strategies in your life that will help you reach your full potential
  • Looking at what you’re doing well and build on your strengths
  • Identifying the areas that need improvement and challenge yourself to get better
  • Monitoring your behavior and identify strategies to help you be more productive
  • Regulating your emotions to change how you feel
  • Changing how you think and behave
  • Evaluating your thoughts to make sure they are realistic and productive
  • Asking for help when you need it and surround yourself with supportive people
  • Committing to being a healthy role model for others

Developing mental strength is not about being the best at everything–it means knowing that you will be okay no matter what happens!

The Four Doors Of Innkeeping

four doors of innkeeping

 

The Four Doors of Innkeeping is based on the book The Four Doors: A Guide to Joy, Freedom, and a Meaningful Life by #1 New York Times bestselling author Richard Paul Evans.  There are more than 17 million copies of his books in print worldwide, translated in more than 24 languages.

 

Door #1: Believe There’s a Reason You Were Born

Never underestimate the power of belief. Not only is there a reason you were born, but there is a reason that you are an innkeeper.  Just like teachers with their students, you will never know the amount of lives you touch for the better as you host and serve your bed and breakfast guests. Remember that as you extend warm hospitality to each of them.

 

Door #2: Free Yourself from Limitations

Most of our greatest learning experiences (and successes) come because of adversity (and failures). Everyone has problems.  It’s how we deal with them that matters. If you had to deal with (or are in the process of overcoming) zoning issues, renovation problems, or even a public relations nightmare, you can come out better on the other side.

 

Door #3: Magnify Your Life

Dreaming is the first step to making our lives greater.  Ask yourself, “What if…?” Be willing to take risks. We should use our talents and gifts to make more out of our lives.  This could mean that in addition to running a bed and breakfast inn, that you may add a restaurant, a gift shop, or even a spa.

 

Door #4: Develop a Love-Centered Map

Love is the secret to joy.  The greatest source of happiness comes from giving and receiving love. Love is what love does. We develop love through service.  Love is both the destination and the journey.  As you appropriately love your guests, they will come become repeat visitors as well as spread by word of mouth (and hopefully online reviews) their enjoyable experience as your guests.

The author reminds us that we have a choice to live a more abundant life, a life of joy, freedom, and meaning.  We can improve our lives by opening these four doors of innkeeping. Feel free to comment below about how these four doors relate to you and your innkeeping experiences.